Sunday, May 18, 2008

Best Mommy Moments: May, 2007

“Henceforth, any stuffed animal wishing to leave the Papizan Chair must have a travel visa, authorized by me!”
--Mommy, cranky at the mess of stuffed animals sprawling across her floor.

“You have opened a hole there, Gail. Eric will walk up to you with a piece of paper saying, 'Sign this! Mr. Alligator needs to go upstairs!'”
--My neighbor, P., about the travel visa story.

“...Draconian measures...”
...Feel like criminal terrorist suspects...”
...Sever diplomatic relations...”
...Rescind most favored trade status...”
...Babysitting strike...
--Angry snippets of conversation emanating from the Papizan Parliament. I suspect dragons Reggie and Eustace, particularly, of murmuring about the Travel Visa crisis.

      “...One day the dragon sneezed in the woods and caught the trees on fire!” [Page turn]
      “The dragon ran to the nearest house. He knocked and the Three Bears answered.” [Page turn]
      “'Help!' cried the fiery dragon, 'A tree is on fire!' Quickly the Three Bears grabbed a bucket of--”
      “Danny, what do you think the Bears grabbed? Water? I bet you're right. [Page turn]
      “Oatmeal???” [Mommy cleans her glasses] [Danny giggles] “Yes, it says here they grabbed a bucket of oatmeal and rushed to smother the flames with their breakfast porridge!”

--Mommy, “reading” Danny like a book. A “page turn” means folding him in half briefly.

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